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Frank Morris
Frank Morris. 20 March 2024

Short Story: Lennie Lower was the Prince of storytellers!


I pride myself on my looks, said the Professor.

Double trouble made its way into the conversation. “I’m not old,” Professor Gudgeon said. “I pride myself on my looks, so, there!”

In one of his quirky essays (Arthur) Bryant opined that “one of the advantages of growing old is that one has to have one’s hair cut less frequently; it is one of the lesser afflictions of civilised life, but one that I have always resented and postponed for as long as possible.”

Main: Professor Gudgeon doesn’t like being challenged about looks.

There you are, see what I mean.

The great humourist and columnist, Lennie Lower, grappled with the question of growing old by thumbing his nose! In his novel, Here’s Luck.

Lower’s character, Jack Gudgeon, considered the observations of people who called a man of forty-eight “old, superficial and even frivolous.”

Lower, the mirth merchant, always let his readers down gently.

Face Mask: He had a haircut -- the barber took too much off!

“Gudgeon,” he said, “you’re getting old”.

“I’m not old!” I protested.

“You look old,” he insisted.

“That was a lie. As I said, I pride myself on my looks. I have not a grey hair on my head. I’m not vain, but in my own defence I quote a remark made by a girl in Flannery’s saloon bar to a friend.

“She said: ’I like his ruddy, clean-shaven, ingenuous face, and he has such a splendidly mature figure and manly bearing. That, I think should be sufficient.”’

So, who’s worried about growing older? Think about it. It only happens once in a lifetime. 

<< Frank Morris. Best Years Magazine.

Remember when ...

Graphic Mistake

Many athletes have embraced the ideal of the Olympics founder, Baron Pierre de Coubertin, and that was, “The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not to win but to take part. The most important thing in life is not the triumph but the struggle.” At the fateful moment in the womens 4 x 100 yards relay final at the 1952 Helsinki Olympic Games, Majorie Jackson dropped the baton after taking it from Winsome Cripps, robbing Australia of a Gold Medal. According to a reporter, “Unhappily, Winsome Cripps’ name will always be remembered for an awful mistake.” That was part of wining and part of struggle – one had to pay the price. – FM.

League’s Golden Years

1900: Dan Frawley, early that year, was a young player who became a legend in his own lifetime. 1908: Dally Messenger, former ‘Golden Boy’ of league, captained Easts in the first premiership. 1921: In his first test against England, Cec Blinkhorn scored a try from his own try line minutes after the start. 1925-1929: The celebrated Benny Wearing was the idol of the crowds during South’s Golden Age. 1930s: The giant-like international Joe Pearce had muscles like steel and a docile temperament -- until aroused. – FM.

Majorie Jackson – First woman to win gold

Majorie Jackson: She is the fastest on this planet

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